Charlotte York is arguably one of the most stylish women in the original sex and the city. Naturally, a show about women navigating sex and love has to portray the perspectives women embody, and Charlotte definitely represents an outdated form: the hopeless romantic.
1. She wants to be saved.
Charlotte’s approach, although sometimes thirsty, is very strategic. “Charlotte treated the wedding more like sisterhood than she was trying to promise,” shares her best friend Carrie Bradshaw. In fact, she’s willing to risk everything for it, even her career.
Let’s just say that if dating apps existed during Charlotte’s prime, she’d have accounts on every dating app for affluent women, with a corresponding calendar to schedule weekly dates – because she’s already learned the hard lesson about double-booking in season 2.
“Charlotte treated the wedding more like a sisterhood that she was trying to pawn.”
Unlike her more raunchy peers like Samantha and Carrie, Charlotte is a firm believer in the “3.5 kids with a white picket fence” trope. However, she is smart in that she doesn’t believe Prince Charming will come knocking on her door. Instead, she plots and plans until she finds the man of her dreams.
2. She wants a placeholder, not a partner.
So who is Charlotte’s dream man? She’s looking for a rich, successful man who would make a great husband and father – all reasonable requests if you think about it. Her problem is that she’s not looking for a partner to live with, she’s looking for a man to complete the last missing piece of her manifestation chart. She has the heart, the looks, the money, the career, but not the man. Even when she realizes that some options aren’t viable, she still forces the perfect picture.
3. She thinks getting hit by a taxi is a good omen.
The two meet as Charlotte flees a date that should never have happened. As she runs, a taxi hits her and knocks Trey out of the backseat. A rich and nice cardiologist from Park Avenue. She’s convinced it’s her knight in shining armor.
Flash forward only two episodes later, she finds the cheat code. While having dinner with Trey and his mother, she notices that when his mother gently squeezes her wrist and makes a request, he complies. Naturally, Charlotte being the strategist that she is, she takes a mental note which she revisits the following evening at dinner.
Charlotte sensually places her hand on Trey’s and asks him the question she’s been dying to hear for months: “Maybe we should get married.” His answer ? “Okay.”
Oh the irony in which she finally bumps into — or should we say, bumps into — the alleged man of her dreams. Not only does she propose, but the answer could have been articulated by a child. So much for his fantasy.
4. She neglects her sexuality for the idea of perfect love.
In the same episode Charlotte offers, her friend Samantha Jones learns she’s “dating a guy with the funkiest cum.” To be precise, she compares it to asparagus gone bad with a *dash* of Clorox. As if Samantha’s sexcapade had personally offended her, Charlotte grabs her purse and storms out. Although Samantha is known as the most sexually progressive friend, here she just talks about things you should be able to discuss with your girlfriends.
“Think about it, if you can’t complain about a bad taste of cum with your best friend, who can you turn to?”
Charlotte’s apprehension towards all things sex-positive brings great comic relief — many of us have probably wanted to get out of a room at some point. But it really shows how far she will go for the socially acceptable side of life. But think about it, if you can’t complain about a bad taste of cum with your best friend, who can you turn to?
5. She chooses fairy tales over authenticity.
Charlotte’s desire to be a posh Park Avenue bride causes her to live unauthentically for years. Even though her relationship with Trey progresses and she realizes it’s a “fake Fendi,” she still poses for that perfect fake photo. There’s even a moment right before she meets Trey, where she ditches her real friends for married friends so she can meet more eligible singles.
The quality of desperation isn’t something we can entirely blame Charlotte for. We never really understood why she was so determined to find love, but like most women, it probably has to do with societal pressures and that biological clock. Most women in America are conditioned to prioritize love and marriage over individual achievement, but one thing we all now agree on is that women can have both. if they wish.
6. She craves acceptance in the form of being “woman material.”
One of our favorite moments in Charlotte: the double-booked day. Charlotte rarely shows shame in her quest for the perfect man, and in Season 2 she ambitiously books two dates in one night. An early dinner and a late dinner. Old Charlotte would have lived in fear of being called a whore, but this Charlotte is so focused on her dream that public opinion doesn’t matter. Until she kisses her second date goodnight and the first date catches them, suddenly shame washes over her and she reverts to her stereotypical “classic” ways.
A lesson in love from Charlotte
In the end, Charlotte’s quest for love is rather thirsty but she taught us the importance of being authentic and open-minded. After all, if you’re not authentic, you might manifest a Trey-like lover who’s great on paper, but not great for you.
During one of the iconic events sex and the city lunches, Charlotte takes a book from her bag entitled Marriage Inc.: How to Apply Effective Business Strategies to Find a Husband. Samantha hilariously saves the day with a snide remark, “Chapter One: How to get ahead giving head.” The perfect balance, because in truth, even though we love Charlotte, her ways of “looking for me” tend to spiral out of control and lead us away from the real truth: Charlotte is a loving, kind and successful woman who doesn’t shouldn’t have been looking for someone to save her.
Fortunately, we have seen this shift in today’s society where women are embracing new ways of life, whether it’s living the traditional way or choosing platonic love over marriage or non- -ethical monogamy. What matters most is living authentically and prioritizing what feels authentic to you, not social scripts and social pressure. It sounds cliché, but if something is really meant for you, it won’t escape your notice. Ironically, that’s exactly how Charlotte meets her Harry.